Due to confusion among our loyal readers, the editors have renamed the characters portrayed herein. Henceforth, the characters shall be known as:
The Penguin (a name which should be recognizable to his friends and family)
Peaches (that’s me! a pseudonym which has seen several incarnations in my life)
Neko (as previously explained, the “lucky cat,” our daughter)
Recurring future characters names (animal, vegetable or mineral) will be subject to similar confusion.
In celebration of the renaming of the aforementioned, a pictorial representation follows: